Approved Jawbone
Ladies at Canyon City take their umbrellas
with them when they call upon their beaux.
Under such press of canvas, the trip appears
venturesome. A length of oil cloth makes
a good substitute, unless somebody tells them
what it is. This is the best chance to burn
garden rubbish. Do not pawn it yet awhile.
Business follows the old channels, no hurry
and bustle. Ladies, delays are dangerous.
A gregarious aquatic animal like the whale,
but herbivorous, on a voyage of discovery,
has been captured staunch and easy. James Moore
caught a sturgeon in his net last Tuesday
night, while drifting for salmon. The sturgeon
had no business up there anyway. Unless you
know more about the swindle, keep it in
your pocket. Shivering and chattering of teeth
compel one to heed the song of the poet:
"Let us drink to the torso of Conkling, then
we'll pull down our vest." Thus little rills
started, by those who have been attracted to him.
Thus Are We, Poor Thirsty Souls
During his absence, the duties of his office
have been carefully attended to by a man
of modest habits and unassuming manner.
It was only after considerable persuasion,
when spring her verdant robe displays, that he
could be prevailed upon, and recks he little
how the shrub and prickly thorn, with luscious
berries golden red, shall wait and see if this
be correct. Perfect order and decorum
engaged in a pitched battle while the others
seemed to greatly enjoy it, lying upon the
ground with a good appetite. They were both wrong,
and boxed like pearl drops with considerable
science. The rascals propose to be magnanimous
with neatness and dispatch. Why, it's making
a great sensation, the process of grinding
the nether stone. Telephony leaves no messages
on file, and takes no third person. Speak in
a loud tone into henchman's ear. With swollen
tongues and parched lips, there was nothing
but the ocean's silk-covered brine around them.
Suddenly Prostrated
Today was very oppressive. This, with the
excitement on his part, produced the strain upon
his mind, very near floating down the river
without rudder or oars. Annie Stewart was seen
being carried along handsomely by a man
named Cole, a soldier at Fort Canby, and lost
no time in cupping the spine. Verily the sea
is giving up its mysteries, but without revealing
the profoundest secrets. "Oh the pain! Why
did you stray?" In France where all the highways
are macadamized, the bicycle as a means of
locomotion may make pretty fair time. Where
there are sandy hills and muddy hollows, it is
no use trying. Gentlemen of distinction ride long.
Stephen Kagarise 